Feeling Like Job In The Bible When He Had The Painful Sores On His Body

Yeah this is how I feel most mornings. Thought I would share this gross yet funny pic since Halloween is right around the corner.

That past few days have been another fight. Sunday October 23rd I woke up with a horrible pain in my neck. I went to the bathroom looked in the mirror and there at the base of my neck was this large sore!

It was hot to the touch as if it had a fever in it and very red and infected. So the next morning on Monday I called the doctor right a way to make an appointment. Because I've had sores like this popping up on my body for 2 years now every 2-6 months and the only way to get rid of them is to go to the doctor and get put on an antibiotic.

I make my appointment to my family Doctor and he takes one look at this horrible sore on my neck and tells me, that this one has him worried. Because I'd never gotten one on my neck before and there are lots of complications that can arise with a sore like this on the neck. He said he was happy that I came in right a way to have it treated, because if not it could have turned to something really bad in just a couple of days. So, he puts me on another round of antibiotics, and prescribes me also a antibiotic cream to put on the sore and other sores that might pop up to heal them. He also took a culture of it, which came back negative for STAPH or anything which is good but doesn't really explain why i keep getting these sores.

I'm on the antibiotic until the middle of next week, and already it is causing problems with my Crohn's. As all antibiotics do. Last night was the worst.......Literally Jeremy and I got 0 hours of sleep, even after I maxed out my pain meds I would dose off for a few minutes and then wake up with horrible intestinal and stomach pains. By the time the sun was coming up this morning and it was going on 8 a.m. I just broke down and cried. Because of no sleep, pain, and most of all it was time to take another round of the antibiotic. Which in turn repeats the vicious cycle.

My Gastro Dr. thinks I need to be referred to a dermatologist because neither him nor my family dr. know why I keep getting these horrible sores all over my body. However, if you look up symptoms/side effects of Crohn's disease it says that Crohn's can cause painful large sores on the body and even inside the body of a person with the disease. But for some reason when I tell the doctors this when they ask me why I think I keep getting these sores and I tell them I think it's because of the Crohn's they just look at me with like they aren't sure. Don't get me wrong I love my doctors, it's just I am really tired of having to take antibiotics every 2-6 months to fight these nasty sores. I also would like to know why I keep getting them, but it seems there are more questions than answers right now.

So it looks as if I'm going to be going to a dermatologist in the very near future. Which means more tests to be run and more bills to have to pay. Oh Joy!

Along with all this I have another fight with Medicare! I just received yesterday the bill for my Gastro Emptying Scan I had done over a month ago at Mount Carmel West Hospital, and Medicare is refusing to pay anything on this bill! Now Monday I have to call Medicare and try to talk to them and see why they won't pay anything and are leaving me with a $115.00 bill to pay. I have my suspicions as to why and it has to do with the Oh Great Adena Hospital that I talked about in my last blog about how they have been billing medicare for bills they shouldn't be.

The only good news this week I have so far is that I am now on A prescription strength generic version on Prevacid to help with the Damage in my esophagus. it is affordable and cheaper than buying the over the counter version of Prevacid.

I did go to my Grandparents and spent the night with them on Tuesday to give poor Jeremy a break so that he could get some much needed rest. Taking care of me day n and day out is very tough for anyone, especially when you sleep in the same bed with them and they are crying and whimpering in pain in their sleep waking you up. I had not been to my Grandparents in over a month from being so sick. It was great to just have a change of scenery and talk to my Grandma and my Poppy. It is so hard on them to watch me struggle and fight this disease, especially my Grandma because she is the type of person who wants everyone to be happy. And it's clear that I'm not happy most days especially a day like today. She's told me "I've prayed some nights when I know you are in so much pain, that God give me your pain. I'm old and I have been through more than you and I can handle this better than you can."

Sadly she is not the only one who has prayed this prayer. My Jeremy at times has laid next to me holding me and stroking my hair as I cry out in pain. Yelling, "God GIVE ME HER PAIN PLEASE TAKE IT FROM HER AND GIVE HER A BREAK FROM THIS! I CAN HANDLE THE PAIN GIVE IT TO ME!

But for some reason God chooses Not to take my pain away and I have to go through it even if it lasts hours or days on end.

Having To Fight Every Inch Of The Way

The past few days have been really rough.

First After suffering through for nearly 5 days with severe abdomen and stomach pains from the upper endoscopy, the pains have finally stopped. That was the worst pain I've felt in over 4 months.

Monday was literally the worst day. I was on the phone 5 times with the Gastro Clinic about my Crohn's Med's. Because when we went to the pharmacy they told us the Entocort (steroid to treat crohn's disease) was going to cost me $385.00 with my prescription drug plan. We were FREAKING OUT! So we called the gastro clinic, and they got busy calling the pharmacy asking why the medicine is costing this much even with the generic brand?

Then while dealing with this the mail comes and I get another medical bill that I'm NOT suppose to be getting, from the worst hospital in my opinion in the entire south central Ohio area "Adena" I don't even know why they have a billing department. Here is why I ask this question....

I go to Adena to have a test done or in this instance I went to the ER. I wait sometimes up to 3 months before I get a bill. The hospital is located in Chillicothe Ohio, but the bill comes from Michigan! Then when you are to mail the bill back and make your payment to "Adena" in chillicothe Ohio you mail it NOt to Chillicothe Or To Michigan where the bill came from, NO you mail back to Cleveland Ohio! However, when you have a complaint like we always do because we are getting bills from Michigan that we aren't suppose to be getting or we are getting double bills and they may just be double billing Medicare and screwing them over too. We have to call the phone number listed on the bill. The phone number is to Chillicothe Ohio Adean Hospital, not Michigan where the bill came from. So then you get the opportunity to talk to people who have no idea why we are getting the bills we are getting and they have to then go into their billing department computers that seem to be in Chillicothe Ohio but are being printed in Michigan and then processed in Cleveland Ohio to try and get this all fixed!

So upon receiving a bill I'm not suppose to and now reading the above story that we go through nearly every month. And dealing with possibly having to pay $385.00 for one prescription you know I'm freaking out completely!

At the same time all this is going on, my Friend Dawn comes over to try and cheer me up by giving me 2 Jeremy Camp T-shirts her and Gary bought for Jeremy and I at the Concert on Sunday that we had to miss because of the Crohn's acting up. I'm so thankful she was there for a short time because she saw what I was going through and I was having to deal with it all on my own because Jeremy was in class.

So after 5 phone calls from the Gastro clinic they finally some how some way got the Entocort prescription down to $85.00 from $385.00. The lady from the Gastro clinic even said she doesn't understand what the people at my pharmacy were doing and how they got the price of $385.00 for that prescription.

I can work with $85.00 because we still don't know how long I'm going to have to be on this medicine before the Crohn's goes into remission and this prescription will last me over 3 months.

Everything got worked out after nearly 8 hours of fighting and my stress level finally started to go back to normal.

But let me vent a little more about "Adena" Hosptial.......

So after reading all that we go through nearly monthly just to get a bill from them, oh it's not over.

This happened about 4 months ago....
One month when we mailed our bill to them, they say they never received it and without warning a month later when our next bill was do instead of a bill saying they didn't receive the previous months bill, we receive a letter saying they have turned us over to a collection agency! My bill for this hospital is over 10,000 dollars and now that they have turned us over to collections they have added on over 2,000 dollars of interest!

My husband Jeremy was on the phone fighting this for nearly an hour. First off we weren't receiving a bill every month from Adena to pay our monthly payment sometimes we wouldn't get a bill for 2 months and then we'd get one double billing us because they didn't send us a bill every month. Then there was the other time we didn't get a bill for over 3 months and then we called and told them about it now mind you we are calling Chillicothe Ohio the bill is being sent from Michigan. So they say they will send a bill out right a way to us so we can pay.

Now that we are dealing with them turning us over to collections because some how the bill that was sent from Michigan and then we mailed to Cleveland Ohio didn't make it and got lost some how. My husband brings this up and how their billing department is completely a mess and this isn't our fault and we shouldn't be turned over to collections because we are trying to pay our bills.

So to make things right and get out of collections my husband pays 3 months worth of payments when he only had to pay 2 months just to be safe. But here is where it gets ugly...the person on the phone in Chillicothe Ohio says, "it is not our responsibility (meaning Adena) to send you a bill every month, and if you don't pay your bill monthly we will turn you over to collections again!"

HOW the heck are you to pay a bill if you don't receive one and know how much you are paying and how much you have paid? My husband was fuming mad! This person was threatening us!
So to stop this from ever happening again and the bill we mailed getting "lost" we now call every month and pay the bill over the phone, but guess what that doesn't work either.

Because, just a month later after going through this and paying the 150 dollars and being threatened by this "billing department person" who in my opinion is nothing but a con-artist in a cubical we find out when we call the next month to pay our bill, (that we actually got a bill in the mail for dispite what that person said about not having to send bills out) that the 150 dollars we paid was in the computer system but was never credited to our account!!!!!! So this new billing department person we're dealing with has to not only add the 150 dollars to our account that should have been added a month ago but also add on our new payment for the current month!

Luckily since then we have been getting regular bills, but now we are getting double billed and receiving bills we should not have even been billed for because Adena messed up AGAIN! This is the worst hospital billing department EVER!

one day last month while fighting to get a bill removed that I wasn't suppose to have been billed I for asked the "billing department" person on the phone, "I have a question, why is it that when I get a bill it comes from Michigan, and when I mail the bill out it goes to Cleveland Ohio, but when I have to talk to someone about the bill that came from Michigan I have to call and talk to someone in Chillicothe Ohio?" The lady on the phone says, "ma'am I honestly don't know."

Ok, my question is how do these people get this job? Because you have to have a college education to do this job, yet every time I have to deal with someone in that dept. they don't know what is going on or why things are happening to me and my bills? This has not been a year fight, I have been fighting with this hospital for over 4 years now! 4 YEARS!!!! And still people (and different people) in that department don't know what is going on! Holy Crap I think it's time to get a new billing department!

This is why I refuse to go back to this hospital. The last time I was actually admitted to this hospital and stayed there, they tried to give me the wrong medication!!!! THANK GOD I have worked in the nursing field because if I hadn't looked in that pill cup and questioned what was in it, I could have possibly died. When I found out what one of meds were that they were trying to give me I said, I'm not suppose to be taking that I don't have that wrong with me. And immediately I said I wanted patient advocate in my room NOWWWWWWW!

Come to find out that not only were they trying to give me the wrong meds but nurses had been signing off that they had been giving me a medicine that they HADN'T! Not only did the hospitals pharmacy mess up but the nurses were also negligent. And because of this I got one out of the 3 days I was in that hospital written off because if they had been giving me the right meds I would have been out of the hospital sooner. Oh and while all this was going on there was a fire that broke out on the floor above me and that floor had to be evacuated. Luckily I haven't had to stay in a hospital since then and that was the beginning of 2008.

To anyone that stays in a hospital be proactive with your care! I can never emphasis this enough. Never take things at face value, if you are brought a pill to take, ask what it is for and why they are giving it to you. Because asking just might save your life! Remember nurses and doctors are human and humans make mistakes. So don't play Russian roulette with your life. And if you feel you or a family member isn't being treated properly at a hospital or nursing/rehab center you have the right to ask for PATIENT ADVOCATE! You have rights so use them.

Ok I'm done venting about hospitals now....

To get back on track I'm doing better after 5 days of suffering through horrible abdomen pains and sleepless nights and maxing out my pain meds.

I'm still not completely better, and wont really ever be but at least I'm getting back to my "normal" self. Still taking all my meds, but luckily not any pain meds.

It's always a good day when I'm not in severe pain, no matter what I may be dealing with.

Missing The Jeremy Camp Concert NoThanks To Crohn's

I wanted to share something uplifting because, I'm not feeling so "uplifted". Yesterday I began having severe abdominal pains. Nothing helped, and they were so bad that I maxed out on my pain meds. I suffered through the night and today is not any better.

I didn't get to sleep until after 4 a.m. this morning, then I woke up at 7 a.m. in pain, then at 10 a.m. and was awake crying and screaming out until Noon until my pain meds took effect. I slept for 2 hours and woke up at 2 p.m. in more pain, so I thought I would try and write.

Today I've been on a liquid diet only Ensure and water to drink. My husband and I believe where they filled me with air from the upper endoscopy it's has given me very bad gas and to be frank, I have not stopped farting ever since the upper endoscopy, and the only time I feel a little relief from the pain is when I fart. But now after having solid bowel movements for weeks and doing good, I'm starting to have diarrhea again on top of all this going on.

Welcome to another day of a life with Crohn's.

Tonight I was suppose to go to see Jeremy Camp (He's a Christian Rock Artist) at a church in Grove City Ohio. My good friends Dawn and Gary got Jeremy and I tickets nearly 3 months ago as a Birthday present for Jeremy. This was before my diagnosis and everything, and they and us even thought by this time I would be better and able to go to the concert.

Jeremy Camp is one of my favorite Christian Artists his music is biblical and inspiring. Below is my favorite song of his and it is also one of the songs that has helped me through over the past 4 years dealing with what we now know is Crohn's Disease.

I have seen Jeremy Camp in concert before I got sick. However, I'm upset that I can't go this time because I've not been able to go do anything like this in a long time, but I have to accept the things I cannot control and accept the things that i can. I may not be able to see Jeremy Camp Live tonight but i can put in any one of his CD's and listen to all his music.

Today I'm thankful for that, even though right now it's so hard to willingly find something to be thankful for right now. I'm thankful for Jeremy Camp's music and the technology so I can listen to these inspiring songs to help me as I lay in my bed sick and just trying to make it through today.

Because "even when I don't see, I still believe"

Upper Endoscopy And A Good Gag Reflex

ABOVE PIC IS OF THE DIAGNOSIS FROM THE
UPPER ENDOSCOPY DONE TODAY
(Click To Enlarge To Read)

As you can read from the image above, there are more things wrong with me due to the Crohn's Disease. Now I have damage to my esophagus because of the acid and bile build up in my stomach, along with vomiting 1-2 times a week over the course of 6-7 yrs.

The good side to this is the Dr. was able to see that the inflammation in my small intestine had gone down quite a bit from the Crohn's Medication I have been taking, and he was finally able to take a biopsy of it.

However, the Upper Endoscopy didn't quite go as planned. During the procedure, they didn't give me enough medicine to sedate me and my body woke up and I began choking on the tube/scope in my throat. I could feel myself choking and trying to throw up but I couldn't get fully awake. I honestly thought for a few seconds before they quickly shot me with a double dose of sedatives and totally knocked me out, that I was going to choke to death. I couldn't breath and was trying to gasp for air but the scope was in my throat.

The only thing I heard someone say clearly was, "she has a very strong gag reflex" then I was out and the next thing I remember was being told that I was back in my room and needed to wake up and drink something.

Yeah right! It took me over half an hour to be able to open my eyes completely and sit up on the side of the bed. I had never been that knocked out except for when I had surgery, It took me quite a while to even be able to get back into my regular clothes.

Jeremy took a before and after pic of me. The after pic I have no recollection of him telling me he was going to do it, even though he says he did. Looking at them now that I'm awake I laugh at myself. Because honestly what else can you do? After the procedure and I was starting to wake up I was seeing little children or midgets (not sure which) running in a field and I at one point thought I was some where else other than where I really was. I saw glitter falling from the ceiling (again) for some reason I always see glitter falling when I get shot up with these sedatives or pain meds. And pictures flashing fast before my eyes like I was looking through a photo album or slideshow on a computer screen. WEIRD!

So I made it through another day, a little doped up still in the head, but at least we have more answers and within 10 days the biopsies will come back and we'll have an official diagnosis as to what else is going on with me.

Miranda Before Sedation
looking a little nervous but alert and ready to go

Miranda After Sedation
Screwed The Heck Up! Wow!

What Inspires Me To Make It Through Another Day

As I read my bible daily, I also search out for many of the scriptures and passages that I've marked or underlined that seem to help me through the bad days. The Psalms are always my first to turn to, then I make my way through the rest of the books that I've marked in to remember. And after reading a few of them, I find myself saying, I can make it through this day because God has heard my cry, God has seen my suffering, and God is carrying me through.

Psalm 116 1-4
I love the Lord for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live. The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came upon me; I was overcome by trouble and sorrow. then I called on the name of the Lord. OH LORD SAVE ME!

Psalm 118: 17, 18
I will not die but live, and I will proclaim what the Lord has done. The Lord has chastened me severely but he has not given me over to death.

Psalm 121: 1-8
I lift my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord the maker of heaven and earth. he will not let your foot slip--he who watches over you will not slumber; indeed, he who watches over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord watches over you--the Lord is your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day nor the moon by night. The Lord will keep you from all harm--he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Romans 8:15
For you did not receive a spirit that make you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba Father."

Romans 8: 37-39
No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in creation, will be able to seperate us from the love of god that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

2 Corinthians 4: 8, 9
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair, persecuted, but not abandoned, struck down, but not destroyed.

2 Corinthians 12: 7-10
To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

I Won't Let Go

Being musicians my husband and I knew we had to find "our song" for this time in our lives as we go through this journey together. "I Won't Let Go" has become our anthem, my Jeremy has literally had to hold me and "not let go" of me and has carry me to Jesus so many times. Jesus is my rock but Jeremy is sometimes the vehicle to get me to the rock when I am took weak to carry myself.

I hope to one day be able to play this on the piano and sing it without crying. My thoughts are, that if I can get to the point where I can listen to this song, sing it and play it without crying that means I have made it through the pain and have made it to the end of this darkness that I'm walking through and I'm back in the light.

I Won't Let Go lyrics

It’s like a storm
That cuts a path
It breaks your will
It feels like that
You think you're lost
But you're not lost
On your own
You're not alone

I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
And you can’t cope
I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight
And I won't let go

It hurts my heart
To see you cry
I know it’s dark
This part of life
Oh, it finds us all
But we’re too small
To stop the rain
Oh, but when it rains

I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
And you can’t cope
I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight
And I won't let you fall

Don’t be afraid to fall
I’m right here to catch you
I won't let you down
It won't get you down
You're gonna make it
Yeah, I know you can make it

Cause I will stand by you
I will help you through
When you’ve done all you can do
And you can’t cope
And I will dry your eyes
I will fight your fight
I will hold you tight
And I won't let go

Oh I’m gonna hold you
And I won't let go
Won't let you go
No, I won't

I Have Questions But Still Searching For The Answers

Since my diagnosis is so new, there are a lot of questions, and doubts that go through my head daily. I am a Christian but sometimes when I'm in so much pain that I can't bare it, I question God and why he is allowing me to go through this, and why after so many years of people praying for my healing has it not come? Even those praying for my healing are asking the same question.

But the the main question running through my head over the past few days is this......

11 years ago I married a man who I thought loved me and truly wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. But after just 4 months of marriage it was clear that was NOT what he intended for our life together.

After 4 months of marriage he became abusive, and over the next 6 months he beat me, raped me, and held me against my will in his grandparents home, who also enabled him to abuse me because they wouldn't do anything to stop him. His grandparents even kept me from using the phone and or answering the phone when my family called and being able to reach out for help.

After 6 months of enduring abuse daily from my ex husband, one night in late October 2000 everything came to a head. After being told so often by my ex husband that he was going to kill me and if I ever tried to leave him and he would hunt me down and kill me, I knew there was no escaping alive from him unless God made a way for me to escape. So I began praying every night for 2 weeks and told God "Lord if he won't let me go, then you have to make so that every time he looks at me he sees you. Because evil cannot stand to look upon the face of God."

So I prayed this every night and 2 weeks later I was sitting in the livingroom, my ex husband comes in looks at me and yells, "GET OUT! GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE, GET OUT OF MY FACE, I CAN'T STAND TO EVEN LOOK AT YOU!" When I heard those words I knew God had heard my prayer.

In just a few minutes my ex husband was throwing me out of the house. All I had was a small bag of clothes and what I was wearing. He finally allowed me to call my family so that they could come and get me.

I had survived and I thought my life was going to get better after that.

But now 10 years after the divorce has been finalized and I have tried to move on with my life. I'm now diagnosed with an incurable disease.

And the question I've been asking God lately is.....

"Why didn't you let him kill me? Why, knowing that I would end up suffering with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder from the abuse I endured at his hands, and now Crohn's Disease?! WHY!? Death would be the end of all suffering and I would be at peace at last.

Since I'm on this honesty kick I might as well keep being honest. I actually sometimes when I'm in so much pain from the Crohn's Disease, and the endless sleepless nights from the night terrors and flashbacks I have every now and then from the Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I have actually cried out for God to just let me die.

I'm sure I'm not the only person with a debilitating disease or disorder who has cried out the same way in these kinds of moments in their lives at one time or another. Sometimes this life just becomes unbearable and we cry out for relief.

But then I make it through another day and once again I try and find reasons to keep going. Because even though my faith at times is weak, I do have enough to trust God that tomorrow will be a better day.

People have asked me what i see for my life in the future....Honestly, I don't look into the future any longer. All I'm trying to do at this point until we can get this disease under control, is making it through today. Yesterday is gone and tomorrow is not here yet, and God is in control of tomorrow. Today and making it through and staying a live and trying to get through all the pain, questions, and doubts is what I'm focused on right now.

Oh yes I had plans for my future and they were plans I thought God had for me to, but I'm not focusing on them anymore. If they come true, ok then they come to pass, but if they don't I have to accept that they won't. My life is literally in God's hands now. The doctors, my family, my husband, and friends are not in control. No one can heal me or take a way this disease they can only treat it and support me through this new journey in my life. Only God has the power to heal me and I have to totally give my life to him.

So many questions, but still waiting on the answers. Answers that may or may not ever come. That's why Faith is so important even if it's as small as a mustard seed at times.

Miranda You Have Crohn's Disease.........

I never thought I would be writing a blog. Normally I keep a private journal and don't share it with anyone. But on Sept. 7th 2011 I received a letter that changed my life, and I would never be the same again.
As a result my husband Jeremy feels I should write a blog about my journey.

My journey living with Crohn's Disease.
The Above letter is what I received in the mail on the morning of Sept. 7th 2011. It reads as followed...
Dear Ms. MIRANDA CAVERLEY,
Your colon biopsy does confirm crohns disease. The gastric emptying scan shows intial delayed emptying but at the end of 4 hours the emptying was normal. Let's see how you do on the entedcort and lialda, please call with a progress update in 2-3 weeks. If you are not improved, we will need to go to prednisone. Given the initial delay in emptyingon teh GES, and the new diagnosis of crohns, I think it is important to eventually perform an upper endoscopy to ensure nothing else is going on. We can wait a month or so to do so.

Timeline: End of 2007-Present
For 3 1/2 years I have been in and out of the hospital. Test after Test run (but not the right ones) and on all kinds of different medicine to try and help my "symptoms" But finally in May 2011 I got a new family doctor, one that actually cared about me and didn't just toss me off with a quick look at and write me another round of meds that were only temporarily taking care of the symptoms.

My new doctor right away referred me to Dr. Garuda at Ohio Gastroenterology Group at Mount Carmel West Hospital in Columbus Ohio. Dr. Garuda saw me and started ordering every kind of blood test that could be ran, and a gastric emptying scan (I'll explain what that is later)

So I went and had another Gastric Emptying Scan done to see whether or not I really have Gastroperesis. This test is pretty weird. I had had it done 3 years ago by another gastro dr. and it showed I had gastroperesis which means the nerves in my stomach are damaged. But that was all that Gastro dr. did he gave me a prescription of Reglan and this powdered medicine I was to drink and that was all. My new family dr. was NOT impressed with him either so here I am 3 years later and I'm in worse shape than before. And going into have another Gastric Emptying Scan done

Now before the the "GES" (as we will call it) is done, you can not have anything to eat or drink 6 hours prior to the procedure. You arrive 1 hour before your scheduled time to "prep" your prep is a Nucleur Medicine Tech comes out and takes you to this room where they prepare a meal. They fix you scrambled eggs, here's the kicker....the eggs are radioactive! You eat the eggs making sure you don't get any of the eggs on the floor or table and "contaminate" it. After that you are taken to a room where you will either depending on the way the hospital does their GES tests lie you done on an x-ray board with a little bit of padding and you lie there for 2-4 hours while this machine hangs above your belly and scans your stomach to see how fast or slow the radioactive eggs digest. Or the hospital may have you after eating the radioactive eggs they will have you stand in front of a type of x-ray machine and take a picture of your stomach every hour for 4 hrs. I've had both ways done and let me tell you the picture taking every hour is WAY easier.

So after the test is complete you are then given a paper you must carry with you for 3 days. The paper says you have participated in a test where you ate radiation because say if you are going travel on a plane or go through a security point, you will set off the alarms and scare everyone out of their wits....just kidding.

This time around the test came back that there was a delay in the digesting of my food but that after 4 hours all the eggs had digested. So Dr. Garuda did not diagnose me with Gastroperesis.

However, not long after we got the results back from the GES test, all the blood work I'd had done came back.....It was Not good at all.

At 8:30 a.m. At the end of July 2011 I get a call from Dr. Garuda's secretary Brenda. When I saw they were calling that early I knew something was up. This was the phone call every person prays they never get, and it had just came true for me.

I answer the phone and Brenda tells me she has bad news.
She says, "Miranda your blood work came back and your intestines are severely inflamed, it looks like you may have an intestinal disease. Dr. Garuda wants to get you scheduled for a colonoscopy as soon as possible."
She tells me to give her a call tomorrow after talking with my husband and family about it, to schedule the day for the colonoscopy.

It was like a dream, did I really hear her right DISEASE? I look at my husband Jeremy and tell him everything and I break down and start crying. Immediately I call my Mom, and Grandma and tell them the news. After that Jeremy drives me to my Grandma's to stay the day while he goes to his college classes. It was like someone had punched me in stomach as hard as they could and knocked the breath out of me. I was in total shock...DISEASE!

They next day Brenda calls me and we schedule my colonoscopy. The earliest they could get me in was August 31, 2011 and that was 3 weeks away.

So I suffered through until then, but before then I had to be rushed to the hospital with severe abdomen pains, and found out I had a severe Urinery Trac Infection On top of the vomiting, nausea, stomach and intestinal pains from the possible at this point intestinal disease. The hospital puts me on the antibiotic Cipro and a week later I'm prepping for my colonsoscopy.

The night before the colonoscopy I had to drink 64 oz of Gatorade with a 7 day supply of Miralax in it to clean me out. However, with me already sick to my stomach and having pains in my intestines drinking this stuff didn't work out very well.

I was so sick I was only able to drink half of the 64 oz and the rest I threw up. I was so sick and in so much pain I actually passed out on our couch. My husband Jeremy got no sleep that night and by morning neither of us had had any sleep.

The colonoscopy was scheduled for 9 a.m which meant we had to be there at 8 a.m. and we had an hour and a half drive to columbus. So we met my Mom and she drive us to Columbus and at 8a.m. they called me back to prep me.

The nurses could tell I was very sick and right a way started taking my vitals. I was in so much pain my pulse was 100bpm and my blood pressure was 151/90. As soon as they could they got me to the Operating Room and got an IV started, the moment they gave me a shot of Zofran (anti nausea med) my stomach stopped hurting and my nausea went away. But it wasn't until they gave me the Muscle relaxer did I start to feel good. The moment I got the shot I was in heaven and I didn't care about anything because I was in no pain.

The next thing I know I'm waking up and the colonoscopy is over. The nurse comes in to tell me I have to FART! Yes Fart because until I do I can't leave because they filled me with air. Boy you should have heard all the other patients ripping off. It was like a massive Farting party going on in that clinic...I had to laugh!

But even with that funny moment the nurse had a very worried look on her face. I asked her, "is it bad?" She says, "yes." I say, "Is it something that can be cured?" Her eyes look very sad and she says, "No."

After that my Mom and Jeremy come in to sit with me as we wait for Dr. Garuda. It didn't take long and Dr. Garuda comes in and tells us the news

He tells us that he could not even finish the colonoscopy because when he got to the small intestine he had to stop because the small intestine was so inflamed that he could not even get his little scope in it. He says that it looks to be Crohn's Disease but that they won't know for sure until they get the biopsies back in a week or so. But he said that he is starting treatment now so he put me on Entocort (a steroid specifically for Crohn's Disease) and I will be on that until the middle of November 2011 and he also put me on Lialda (it is used to treat Crohn's Disease and Ulcertive Colitis). I am to also start eating a Crohn's Disease style diet and or drink liquids and soup until the inflammation gets under control so I won't be in as much pain. I got my prescription and a bunch of free samples of the medicine so we could start them right a way, and we headed home.

On Sept. 7th 2011 I received the above letter officially diagnosing me with Crohn's Disease. 3 1/2 years of doctors, tests, meds, being fired from jobs and having to quit jobs because of my health, having a nervous break down and being officially disabled, we now have a diagnosis.

Now it is October 10, 2011 and here I am writing my first blog. Why? Honestly I don't know at this point, my husband believes that through my writings, it may help and inspire others. Will it? Only God knows.

This Friday Oct. 14, 2011 I go have an Upper Endoscopy done because not only do I have Crohn's Disease but Dr. Garuda thinks there may be something going on as well in my stomach like ulcers, hernias etc. and he wants to make sure he has checked every end of me out.....literally. I'm not worried about the Endoscopy because I had this done right before I had my gallbladder surgery 4 years ago. What does worry is what they may find.

On top of having this Endoscopy done, I'm also fighting another Urinery Trac Infection. Which we think is actually the old UTI I had back at the end of August but never got over fully, and has back with a vengeance. I was on the antibiotic Macrobid to fight this UTI and after taking my last round of pills and going for another Urine Test to see if the UTI is gone, I know it isn't. I'm still in pain in my abdomen, and around my kidneys and if I don't go to the bathroom right a way when I have pee pee it hurts like H.E double Hockey Sticks! So I'm also waiting for a call from my family Dr. about the pee pee test results and whether I need another round of antibiotics, I'm opinion YES I DO!

This is my life, and it's only been a month and 3 days since my diagnosis and it's still unbelievable and I'm struggling to come to terms with the fact that I have an incurable disease that I will have to live with for the rest of my life! That's a tough pill to swallow and right now I don't want to, but this is my journey and I am sharing it with you.